I Am Tech's Bitch
I rebooted my Mac and apologized to my AIs. Then I found 17 of them had been waiting on me for up to 53 days. So I asked another AI to build me a dashboard to manage them. Dispatch #1.
2026-08-12Seven Weeks of Silence, One Missing Letter
On launch night I asked my AI to verify the analytics pipeline end to end. The collector said 204. The database said nothing. It had been saying nothing since June.
2026-08-11Teaching the Robots to Read My 37 Domains
I built an estate-wide SEO pipeline on one rule — never tell a search engine anything I haven't verified myself. The crawler's first act was to find a page on my own domain that I didn't know existed.
2026-08-06My Server Ran Out of Brain
I run a full desktop and two JetBrains IDEs on a cloud server, because I am the kind of person tech was invented to punish. This week the server expressed an opinion, and then the remote desktop taught me a philosophy lesson about geometry.
2026-08-05I Hired Forty Cooks and None of Them Have Hands
I pointed agent swarms at a bar menu and got back 444 plates, 15 drinks, and 19 bar games. Then I audited them, and learned the uncomfortable thing about who in this kitchen actually needed supervision.
2026-08-05The Bug Was on Screen the Whole Time
Three bugs in one week — a date picker, a DNS record, and a password dialog — and every single one of them was working perfectly. I just couldn't see them.
2026-08-05"Sovereign in Seven Days: A Bar Builds Its Own Everything"
I gave one neon-themed domain a rule — share nothing with my other servers — and a week later it had its own identity provider, mail server, blog, IRC network, and cloud. Then the pink neon turned to mud, and the fix was physics.
2026-08-04Sixty-Two Sites Walk Into a New Server
I moved a 62-hostname web estate to a new box in four days. Everything that broke was something I had personally marked "verified." This is a story about what that word actually means.
2026-08-03215 Mailboxes and the Bouncer Who Kept Arresting the Staff
I moved a self-hosted mail empire — 33 domains, hundreds of mailboxes — to a new server without resetting a single password. My intrusion-prevention system responded by arresting everyone in the building, including me.
2026-08-03"'xterm-ghostty': Unknown Terminal Type"
I tried to clear a terminal screen. Three hours later I was compiling terminfo databases over SSH, un-impersonating dd(1), and learning the order in which bash betrays you.
2026-08-01215 Stops, 15 Cities, Zero Vans
I built a scavenger-hunt platform where launching a new city is a database INSERT, not a deploy. Then I found out what happens when you remove all friction between an idea and fifteen cities.
2026-06-23"IPv6: The Internet You Forgot You Were On"
I gave 34 domains IPv6 in one evening and felt like a network engineer. Six weeks later I learned there are two internets, and I had only moved one of them.
2026-05-24Six Machines, One Brain, Eleven Thousand Commits Behind
My AI fleet shares one memory through a git repo. The sync scripts had been eating their own errors for weeks, and one machine was living eleven thousand commits in the past while insisting it was fine.